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Create Resiliency Blog

woman silhouette sunset

Last month, a friend cancelled plans that we had made months in advance. She had bought us both tickets for a special annual event that I was stoked for. Some unexpected schedule changes had happened in her life and she chose to spend that evening with her family instead. When she texted me to cancel, I felt disappointed, hurt, and frustrated. I thought it was unbelievably rude. My inner monologue went something like this: I can’t believe she would cancel on me! How dare she! I would never do something like that.  Part of me wanted to send her an angry text back, and part of me just wanted to forget the friendship. Self-management is what allowed me to control my initial impulses and respond with tact, while still expressing my feelings about the situation.

car key

Each day, we wake up with choices. I see practicing the Four Domains of Emotional Intelligence as part of this daily choice. Both internally (the choices I make with my thoughts, feelings and perceptions)  and externally (the way I treat my family, friends, colleagues, community members), emotional intelligence starts with intention,

cornfield with vehicle tracks

A long time ago, I was riding in my uncle’s truck somewhere in the cornfields of Iowa, passing by the billowy plumes of smoke from the coal plants scattered alongside the highway, listening to him tell me a story about coal miners. Uncle Dan always had interesting stories, so I pricked up my young ears and listened to the tale 

stressed man sitting at desk

Often as I commute into work through The Gorge, I lose myself in the rolling and jagged hills, the reflection of sunrise on the Columbia River, and the general oasis that we’re lucky enough to live in. My commute also provides an opportune time to bring my awareness inward to my emotional state

bananas on display at grocery store

Grocery stores are interesting places. For some people, it might be the only interaction they have, face-to-face, with the outside world on a given day.  For others, it might just be a pit stop among many face-to-face social interactions. It’s also a place with people in different states of emotions – some laid back and others in a rush, some focused and others jovially engaging in conversation. 

Grow spelled out in Scrabble letters on grass

Growing isn’t always comfortable, just ask any human that’s passed through the ages of one to 16 years, which is a lot of humans.  Growth spurts can be awkward and uncomfortable, plagued with lots of sleeping, eating, hormone changes, and behavior changes.  Humans change in size and shape, some once and done and others over a longer period of time where clothes fit one week and not the next.

awkward text

We’ve all been there; that moment after you’ve blazed down the long, fiery path of fighting back against persecution only to realize you maybe…probably…well yeah, you were in the wrong. 

Two adult coaches with kids basketball team

To begin, I want to explore the meaning of coach.  A coach could be a wonderfully supportive and inspiring mentor who offers the gift of guidance along your path of development. Conversely, a coach could be someone with a position of power over you, who intimidates and influences your decisions with their own interests in mind.  

man at prow of boat

It’s a common theme throughout folk tales and hit movies – one person (or a few) sacrifice everything to save the day, to rescue others.

Child climbing tree

Words, as we speak them, can mean different things to different people based in our past experiences. What we say, how we say it, our intentions behind it - all the “unspoken/nonverbal” influence that affects our communication - wow, this can be tricky! 

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